If you knew or loved Anne-Christine, please share your memories.
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Jun 9, 2017
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Domestic Abuse Survivors Who Fight Back: It’s NOT ‘Mutual Abuse’
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I was her college English teacher, and her writing immediately set her apart from the drivel I had to read every day. She was accomplished, erudite, and brilliant. What a loss. I still feel it keenly.
Anne-Christine was a student of mine in my freshman English class. What stuck me about her then were her writings, so beautiful and mature, but her very reserved personality as well, elusive yet apparent strange and alive. Then. I was troubled when I read about her story because during that time in class she was living in her own hell because of the creep who killed her, I might have helped had I known what was going on in her personal life. But being who she was, she kept all that hidden from others like me. I still read her writing assignments from time to time, and the specialness and grace of her inherent talent and mind leave a painful void. She is missed.
I was Anne Christine’s English teacher in college. I first noticed her because of her poetry, which for me was so mature, profound, and beautiful that I found it hard to believe anyone that young could express so well and use such rich, powerful language I have only experienced from the great romantic poets I have studied. It pained me when I heard of her demise at the hands of the cretin she had married. A tragic tale for the ages. I reread her verse amazed at its power, sense of feeling, it’s awesome language. All gone because some rich kid cretin could not compete with nor stand in her light. Such is the stuff of tragedy and legend, but her poems, which I have several, timelessly ring and cry out beyond her grave for others to hear. It is hard but I re-read them again and again.
My younger brother was close to ACJ in elementary. She was very beautiful and talented… she stood out in a sea of normal in Alberta. I was in Grade 11 and gave her my dress for an event she attended… although she was much younger ACJ looked incredible and completely outshined me in it (and the satin the dress was made of too). I have a daughter now and think of her often… Googling her beautiful face from time to time to keep the flame of her memory alive in a small way. As heartbreaking it is to say, I’m thankful to her for the light she had and the example she’s set after her passing, as a mother who couldn’t abandon her children and has become a symbol of sacrifices mothers will make because they simply can’t let go of their child… the life we create, becomes our world. She had such a beauty light that transcends her passing and will be spoken about in our home as a person of virtue, light and the ultimate sacrifice she made to try to keep her child safe. No woman should be unsafe with a partner or fear separation from their child simply so their partner can feel in control. It’s amazing how much Justice has failed ACJ but at least the person who took her life had to admit to what they did… he can’t hide from his truth or the fact that he couldn’t erase her from his life… he failed and he did not win in the end… he did not escape accountability. Still wish ACJ was here for her children instead… this is a crime that will have an impact far into the future. RIP Anne Christine. You were and are a beautiful angel who deserved so much better in life… I only knew you for a moment but did occasionally touch base on social media. You were always someone who had it… and a light that still radiates from every image you left behind… I hope you are somewhere as beautiful as the light you brought into this world… anc may your children be safe, loved and blessed. I’m glad to know he admitted to his horrible injustice and crime against humanity, what he did to beautiful you. Your quiet beauty and peaceful demeanour leap from the screen on this website and your light still shines so brightly in the words of your loved ones and in all the images here. I’m thankful to see you’re honoured here and helping guide others to safety… much love to you behind the veil. RIP.
Domestic violence is battery. Period. Whether it’s some stranger or your husband, let’s not mitigate it or the punishment by calling it something different. This was a striking example of such sexism, giving her children away, I’m staggered and shocked. Look at the YEAR.
Thank you for memorializing ACJ. I’m so so sorry about your daughter, no words…
Hello, Stephanie. I am a senior women’s magazine writer from the UK – I specialize in writing about domestic violence to raise awareness of this horrendous crime. I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter Anne – I was wondering if you might be interested in sharing her story across the Pond? Would love the opportunity to speak you about this. Thanks so much!
October is domestic violence awareness month. It’s something I never talk about, but if I share my story and it helps 1 person, it will all be worth it. So here we go deep breaths.
Domestic violence comes in many forms and it can happen to anyone, even the strongest person. I never in a million years thought I could be a victim. I believed all the tearful apologies, the flowers, the cards. I was the little girl wearing sweats on a beautiful summer California day to cover the bruises all over my body.
My abuser was my son’s father. The abuse started when I was 4 months pregnant and for almost a year and a half I kept it a secret. I endured it alone, I was ashamed. I got used to it and the most heartbreaking thing is I did not want to worry my family.
It became normal. It felt weird if a day went by and I didn’t get hit. The abuse was almost comforting. If it didn’t happen, I felt anxious. I look back and I can see it forming as if it were on a timeline.
It started with slowly being cut off from family and friends, emotional abuse, mind games, beating down my self esteem, making me believe I was nothing.
Once the verbal abuse started it quickly escalated and I began to be physically abused every day. The severity of the abuse escalated and it got to the point where I knew that whether it was intentional or by accident, my son and I were going to die.
Shortly after the first picture was taken we moved to the opposite side of the country to have a chance at a new life. That picture makes me sad because behind the smiles we were living a nightmare, but we had each other and we stayed strong and smiled for each other.
The second picture is when constant fear wasn’t a daily thing anymore. He was my sunshine and my strength during the darkest times.
Domestic violence is real and sadly it doesn’t magically go away when you break free. I carry the guilt that I stayed as long as I did, that I didn’t ask for help, or admit I was letting this happen.
It’s years later and I am still in therapy, my son is still very sensitive to certain situations, but I’m able to say…we made it. We will always be recovering from what happened, but I will fight with every ounce of my being to keep a smile on my son’s face, love and hope in his heart, and not let the pain dull my fire and keep me from a chance at true happiness.
We’re survivors. Purple hearts!
Anne-Christine:
I loved being a high school librarian. Due to the nature of the job, I became acquainted with many students over the years. Some students made more of an impression on me than others. One sweet girl who made a lasting impression on me was Anne-Christine from the Class of 2004, but I just called her Christine. Her smile, her responsible attitude, and her kind spirit were impressive. I saw her regularly in the library checking out books. She loved to read! After graduation, she loved changing her looks-experimenting with different hair colors, while continuing her love for reading and learning! I saw her in 2013 at a restaurant where she was working. We chatted and when the bill came, it said, “No charge.” That was Anne-Christine.
Domestic Abuse:
However, her life was tragically taken away from us in December, 2016 due to domestic abuse. She leaves behind 2 sons, family, and friends. I’m just asking you to pray for her friends and family as they deal with the tremendous grief they are experiencing now.
Click link to read article. It may make you cry though.
http://people.com/crime/texas-woman-allegedly-murdered-by-ex-husband-once-filed-protective-order-because-she-feared-hed-kill-her/
If you know someone dealing with an abusive situation, intervene, persuade, and do everything you can to prevent a situation like happened with Anne-Christine. Please, before it is too late.
Around the time that Anne-Christine went missing I was going through a bout of abuse from my ex where he hit me and attempted to take our infant son from my home while he was intoxicated. I begged him to just put our son down but he became more enraged and threatened to kill me and hit me.
This was the first time he hit me, and I’ve already taken the steps to make it the last. However, he has gotten drunk and attempted to take our son from me in a rage fueled fit just to spite me at least 4 times before this. Our son is now 4 months.
I’ve filled for a restraining order and I’m praying that with the evidence of his abusive texts that they grant it for both me and my baby boy.
I have a 3 year old who has been a witness to the abuse he has put her and I through theses past 2 1/2 years. I had no idea I was being abused and manipulated. I tried to reason with him and respect him, but he isn’t reasonable and abusers don’t deserve respect they deserve to be punished by the law for their actions and I, [we, her,Anne-Christine] deserve justice and peace.
I understand how she felt she couldn’t escape him, he had everyone fooled and he threatened her and guilted her into the relationship from the start. She couldn’t get away, I barely got away. Family and friends knew and saw the verbal abuse but did nothing and tried to be forgiving just as I was.
We have to stand strong ladies! Mothers! We need you to be wise and courageous and correct your sons and hear and speak for your daughters! Do not ignore the abuse! Do not sit back and wait for them to “learn”. All she will learn is that no one cares or understands. All that he will learn is that he can get away with it.
Teach your daughters now about the cycle and signs of an abuser and shelter and hide them from these animals and guide them and stand with them during court and trial.
Let these beautiful mothers and daughters know that NO you aren’t crazy, NO it’s not OK, NO there is NO excuse, NO there is NO reconciling, NO they aren’t going to change, NO we won’t let you be put down, threatened, abused, and tormented by these bullies any longer!
Im so sorry Miss Stephanie for the loss of your beautiful daughter. she really was a victim and I understand how she felt and I know why she kept going back. She was so kind and loving and forgiving she was almost too good and that’s why Jesus needed her in heaven.
She was far too beautiful for this earth.
I’m praying for you and your family and I am so thankful to have seen this beautiful site dedicated to such a loving and wonderful woman.
I will stand strong against my abuser and will not back down!
I almost backed down twice, but after hearing of Anne- Christine’s story and her loving mother’s testimony, I owe it to my children and to you and her and the abused women of the world to stand strong and seek justice!
I will Not go back to him, I will not forgive, i will not blame myself, and I will not be silenced!
God bless you Ms Stephanie, I pray God gives you peace and comfort in his spirit of everlasting life. I hope it gives you comfort in knowing that your daughters story has opened my eyes to how potentially dangerous my abuser could become. You speaking out for her has touched a life and your voice will help bring justice for a woman and her two children to live a peaceful life.
Thank you for continuing to fight in her name and god bless you and your family!
With love and deepest condolences- aladylovedbyjesus
Anne-Christine was my best friend, she will always be my best friend forever and always. She was the perfect mixture of the sun, and the moon and stars. She was and will always be a bright light in a far too dark world. I won’t take up too much space here, for the loss of my beloved friend and sister walks with me my every waking moment, every tear that is shed, and in my dreams… I love you and miss you so much. I will forever fight for women that feel there’s no way out of domestic violence, in AC’s precious memory and honor. You are so loved.
Another wounded warrior has left us… yes she is a warrior, she fought for her survival every moment of her day. That bastard that took her life selfishly made her leave behind a child, mother, family and friends. My good friend was murdered by her boyfriend, the father of her son. She had an order of protection against him. It didn’t stop him from breaking the window to her bedroom with his gun and pumping multiple bullets into her while she slept. Her 2 year old son was in the bed sleeping next to her. Thank God he wasn’t injured. Neighbors heard the gunshots and called police. When they arrived at the scene, little Lucas appeared covered in his mother’s blood.
This sub human took the life of a beautiful woman… God bless Georgette and Ann Christine….forever in our hearts.
In memory of Georgette Acari
Thank you for sharing excellent information. Your website is very cool. I am impressed by the details that you have on this site. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for more articles.
You, my friend, ROCK! I found just the info I already searched everywhere and simply could not come across. What a great website.
I knew Anne for a short time while she worked with me at Boondoggles Pub. She always fascinated me and made me laugh. She was beautiful, stylish, kind, and cool. I wish I had gotten to know her better. Her story and life have impacted me greatly.
Prayers for peace and for stopping domestic violence.
Domestic Violence is so much on the rise and needs to be addressed by Law Enforcement and the Mental Health Assoc.
So sad to hear of a young girl’s life taken and by her ex-husband! So, so sad. I pray for the young girl, her family and all those who were close to Anne-Christine.
We are heartbroken for the loss of beautiful, bright and kind Anne-Christine, and grateful that in this time of grief you are willing to reach out on behalf of others. We have shared this site locally in for people to be encouraged to watch out for others, and so that Anne-Christine’s name will be said, again and again. <3
Thank you for starting this site to raise awareness for domestic violence. Unfortunately, we have endured the same outcome with my niece in 2012, leaving a little girl without a mother and her mother without her daughter. We, too, did not want this to be in vain and we are working with a counseling center to go into high schools and share her story. Please feel free to message me if you’d like more information. I’m so incredibly sorry. My heart breaks for your family. I know the pain. God Bless you for speaking up!
Thank you for sharing her story so that it may help others in a similar situation. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Our prayers are with your family and other families that have to face this situation. Her legacy will live on through you and others that are faced with this tragedy. Godspeed.
I prayed during the search for her. She is now resting in our Lord’s arms. My prayers go out to the family.
Prayers for the family and friends of Anne-Christine. We must stop Domestic Violence.
What a beautiful eulogy. So sad for this family. What a preventable horrific crime. I am so sad for this outcome.
Absolutely beautiful.
I didn’t know Anne-Christine but I prayed for her while they searched for her. Beautiful obituary. Praying for your family and friends.